Thoughts and Photos #43 – Yosemite

“Positivity. I’m surrounded by positivity. People who want me to feel loved. I’m two day’s in and most of the hiking we’ve done is uphill. I’m pretty sure this is the highest altitude I’ve ever been at, outside of plane rides. It’s been so good…other than the nasty blister on my left big toe. I’m hiking in a group of people made up of Amy’s old trail mates. There’s eight of us in total: Ian, Shoe, CM, David, Kelsi, Jul, Amy, and I.

David has been letting me stay in his tent because Amy and Jul’s three person tent was designed for contortionists. David is incredibly kind. Come to think of it, everyone here is….”

That was a portion of my journal entry from August 29th 2017, two days into my Yosemite trip. It’s been a few weeks since the trip and I think about it often. I think about the way I felt on the trip, the happiness and gratefulness, the disconnect from the outside world. I’m grateful for the time I got to spend in Yosemite. Since I got back the feelings of peace have been fading and replaced with exhaustion.

When I got back to my apartment on September 3rd, I had a full day before I had to go back to work. I took that time and wrote a journal entry that I (a bit dramatically) titled “A Moment of Clarity.” It’s way too honest to share here, but in that moment I knew I was in a special headspace and I needed to talk my future self, a future self who was outside of that headspace. I wrote six rules for my future self to read and follow. Oddly enough I haven’t followed a single one since I wrote them down.

These last few weeks have been difficult, but I’ve rediscovered those six rules, written in a clear mind, and I’ve worked on applying them. Things are getting better.

I write this Thought and Photos, partly to document the trip, but also as an attempt to relive it.

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Thoughts and Photos #43 – Yosemite

Thoughts and Photos #40

It’s crazy to believe that I’ve made 40 of these things. When I posted the first one I had no real idea why I was was doing it or what it was. Now that I’m a little farther along I have a small sense of what Thought and Photos is and why I do it, but I don’t really think I’ve got this figured out.

At the moment, my objective is to capture and document the people and moments around me. The cool part about this project(puke) is that it didn’t start as that, and probably won’t end that way.

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Thoughts and Photos #40

Thoughts and Photos #39

This week, medium format HP5 gets the top spot. It’s been a while since I’ve developed medium format and this roll has made me fall back in love. It’s only a few shots but each one is a little slice of magic. I hope you love them as much as I do.

img246My feelings on the photo above are complicated. The composition is on the sloppy side but what it lacks in compositional brilliance it makes up in a study in timing and absent subjects. It’s something special. img250

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Thoughts and Photos #39

Thoughts and Photos #38

We have quite a large hull today. Lots of photos from the last few months. Even some stuff from as far back as Christmas. That’s what happens when you load film into a camera and forget about it. Anywho…

I’ve been nudged by a friend (thanks Danny) to write more when I throw my photos out the window. That way, whoever finds them might have some idea what the hell they’re about, who took them, and why there are so many of bearded fellow with the hats (he’s my co-worker, roommate, and brother, Alex). I might write caption under a photo, a quote I liked(probably something to make me seem cool and really interesting) or some technical specs, for you nerds out there. What I’m getting at is that I’m not actually sure what this will look like, but I’ll find out.

I know the majority of the people reading this will be my mom and grandma, but just in case there is stranger reading this I’ll try to keep things as descriptive as possible, and not assume you know things about my personal life.

So if words and me guessing where punctuation goes doesn’t seem entertaining to you please continue onto the photos, and ignore the portion of this that’s giving me anxiety. And if pictures aren’t your bag, here’s a video of my humble beginnings.

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Thoughts and Photos #38